web counter The Madness of MokcikNab: Lost In Transition
The Madness of MokcikNab
Motives, movements and melodrama in the life of a thirty something mum.

Monday, February 20, 2006
Lost In Transition

Coming next month : changes.

The company we have built (rather weakly, much like the second pig) will no longer exist as we know it. Suhaimi, Kamarul and I could go on, for the eternal optimists that we all are, the big break seems always just around the corner. And because we're not ambitious, the small breaks have always seen us through. But opportunities, and threats, have caused us to take a momentary retreat. Lily remarked that the company is not winding up, but merely cryogenically frozen, although my husband did say that for you to be cryogenically frozen, first you'll need to die, and second, you'd have to put your faith in technology. Which is pretty much right.

Nonetheless, I think we're going off to do better things : Suhaimi has been picked for a plum position at a telco; and he's dragging Kamarul along. Although my husband thinks I'm the one getting the worst deal -- I get to be a housewife in Jakarta, ho hum -- I'm looking forward to a fresh start. My husband and I have found a modest 1940's cottage in the leafy suburb of Menteng, and I have gleefully drafted a furniture wish-list for every room. The plan is to be a stay-at-home mum for a while, maybe write a little, or go back to school, or sell nasi lemak, or sell 3G content, who knows? Sooner or later the kids would test the limits of my parenting skills (which is not considerable) and I would need to finance my shopping habit (which is considerable); so I don't think "a while" will last very long.

In the meantime, the whole company is in a place that's in between. We haven't done anything productive for weeks, just lolling about trawling the Net, forgetting to pay bills, forgetting to bathe even. We don't come to work until it's almost noon, because we tell ourselves there's a hantu in the office. Everyday, we think of an excuse for an excursion -- cuci mata in Sri Hartamas, chowing down at Pinang Masak in Bukit Tunku, getting lost in Borders or Kinokuniya, or indulging in nasi lemak at Kak Limah's in Chow Kit. It's almost like we want to postpone the inevitable.

But it is The End, at least for this part of our story, and I will miss all this tremendously. At the close of the Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Clementine turns to Joel, at what must have been the saddest point in the film :

Clementine : This is it, Joel. It's going to be gone soon.
Joel : I know.
Clementine : : What do we do?
Joel : Enjoy it.

And that's exactly what we're doing.


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